Erykah Badu faces charges for disrobing in Dealey Plaza and not providing viewers with a ‘Happy Ending’

Neosoul singer Erykah Badu faces a disorderly conduct charge for her nude music video in downtown Dallas’ Dealey Plaza, officials announced Friday. But not for the fact of her being nude, rather for the fact of her being assassinated in the final scene and thus leaving all viewers without the ‘happy ending’ that they had sought.

Badu, a Dallas native, performed a walking striptease in front of tourists and pedestrians during the shoot of her music video for “Window Seat”. The performance ended with a nude Badu acting out receiving a fatal gunshot to the head at the spot where John F. Kennedy was assassinated in 1963. Right at the point of the video where John Murriel says the ending, that he had been anticipating for the entire 5:37 video length, was just about to take place.

“I am thoroughly upset with Ms. Badu. You cannot get your viewers all riled up expecting a ‘happy ending’ with your very suggestive video and then end it with you getting assassinated. That just ruins all the build up. So I am hoping the authorities will take action on her to let her know that, as a country, we will not accept any scene ending without the proper climax.”

Sgt. Warren Mitchell said that the decision to cite Badu for disorderly conduct came after witness, Ida Espinosa, offered a sworn statement to police that, even as a female, she was angry at Erykah for not allowing her the ending that, after a hard day at work, she really needed.

“Having the fact of a witness being there is what let us to file these charges,” said Mitchell. “After much discussion, we felt that these charges best fit her conduct. She disrobed in public without regard to any individuals or small children who were nearby. And without absolutely no regard to the millions of viewers, like myself, who may have been going through some things at that time and needed that ending to clear their mind.”

Mitchell said the department has had “people calling from all across the country to express their concern”. But he was busy investigating the lead of a lone shooter in the School Book Depository who, amazingly, was still able to get off right before Badu’s fatal shot.